Friendship

Friendship? What is that?

Any relationship between u and someone u know, that's called friendship?
Someone u nvr talk to, cant even rmb his/her name but u do recognized his/her face?
Or maybe only someone u reli vry close with?

What does Friendship take place in ur heart?
A working partner? An useful tool? Or juz a joke?

Human -- an animal of born to be selfish in other way.
Say, "friendship is vry important for me", but nvr admit what they did wrong when they argue, keep on get excuses to protect ownself and offense the others.
Say, "i know him/her well, they are juz kind of those person", but they dun even know it's their fault caused argument.
Say, "i know evryone has their prob, we do hav our prob as well", but one side blame the others and stubborn, convinced that they are always right.

Gossip behind ppl, good? Yeah, evryone do say "no good".
But what we'd saw is a group gossip another, except their "member".
Once prob appeared, argument existed, then they will gossip u as well.
Some even gossip u with other ppl, while they are still vry close with u.
This is what we called, Two-headed Snake.

For me, a friend or friendship, was used to be my everything. Ya, i meant it.
I born in a single-parent family, stay with my dad since i was 4.
I got no sibling, no friends since i was a kid, till i came to college life.
I was alone during my childhood, games is my sibling, and my so-called "friends" all juz bully me in the schl.
Why? Bcoz im childish. I dun know anything, i dun hav similar topic to communicate with them.
Bcoz i duno how to dress-up myself, my ugly period ever. Im crybaby when i was a kid.
Evryday look at my classmates, schlmates... They look happy, a group of ppl always joke, always laugh, always hang out together, always got news the day after tomoro.
But, go home on walk alone after class and video tape's cartoon at home is my childhood...
I wish i could be a part of them, i wan to hav friends like them, to fulfill my childhood with happiness.
But i don't get that.

Few years ago, a friendship for me, is juz like a needed.
I need friends to share, to hav fun, to enjoy.
I wanted to share with them anything either good or bad.
I wanted to enjoy party with them, shopping with them, games with them.
I wanted to enjoy every moment i spend with them.
And that's why i tried my best way to comfort ppl around me.
I open wide my heart, giv what i got, without expected get back anything, but their care or even juz a notice.
I believe, someday they will understand me, juz like a drama scene.
I dun care ppl left me over behind, i dun care ppl forget about me, evrytime was like nothin left for me.
Even they ignored me.... But i hate been ignored....
Im naive...


Ya, human need to grow up. Human has to change.
And they will change too.


Now, a friendship for me, it's depends.
I will and i hav to open wide my eyes, not my heart anymore.
Ppl who treat me kind, appreciate me, i would put more effort on this friendship.
Juz like some of my ex-classmates from the same hometown?
Ppl who seems dun care, dun like, or fool me from the beginning, that's it.
And ppl who excited chatting with handsome fella than me, then i will juz stop the conversation. As i said, i hate to been ignored.
I dun wanna listen about fake excuses, i rather u tell me earlier.
Bcoz human is realistic animal as well. This is how usually they arrange the place in their mind :
Face and money at 1st place; sex, game and fun after this, and then a tool or helping hands, then only sincerity at last.

I'd experienced alot, thanks for it, im growing up and learning.
It's not im praising myself, but there's reli not much ppl could think maturely.
I might think in that way, bcoz i used to join a group of friends who's older than me.
They reli taught me alot thing, from anything and everything happened i saw.
Although moral is a great value treasure, but it wont lead u the real treasure.
U wont rich, ur stomach wont full, u wont get wad u wan if u only hug with ur moral.
As long as we are not doin anything crime, we dun hurt ppl, that's enuf. Why not?

So, what does Friendship take place in ur heart?
What is a "friendship"? U get that? ;)